Few months back i broke up with my partner. I thought i knew how much damage that did to her but unfortunately i actually didn’t until few days ago. There’s no doubt we both love each other, and i have always been the one going on and off in the relationship. I didn’t know why i was acting the way i was until i really took out time to figure out what was wrong. I found out i had a problem in accepting genuine love and affection as a result of my dad leaving us when we were young. I didn’t know i was a victim of lack of fatherly love and affection and it created distrust and the need to be protective and always expecting people to walk out of my life. I didn’t know all these until i got tired and decided that i wanted a change. Unfortunately i had already broken my partner’s heart and this really broke her. Right now we’ve both been working on getting back together but it’s been difficult for her and she hasn’t been able to let go all the hurt i caused her. This pain she feel drove her into many bad decisions. I feel so responsible for all the bad decisions she made and i haven’t really been able to stop blaming myself even though we are gradually getting along now. I really want to be able to forgive myself completely and love her genuinely as i should have a long time ago. I have worked on myself and I’m completely free from the hatred i kept in my heart towards my father. What can i do to let go of the guilt and regret especially because her recent mistake really hurt her because she regrets it and really didn’t want to do it but she lost control due to the hurt she feels. I’ve been helping her but i want to be able to do it right so we both can have a healthy and sweet relationship without any need to bring up past mistakes or feel guilty.
