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I love field work especially when working with an NGO. Last year August, I got a job offer to manage 2 LGAs that the NGO was implementing on. I was so glad as I grabbed the offer with both hands. When I resumed, I noticed that I will have to know everything that happens in the both LGA and this means faking a good relationship with more than 50 persons so i could get the information any information i need about my LGAs. I am someone who cannot manage many relationships let alone faking a smile. From days to weeks to months, I was trying my best to see if I could learn how to live a fake life since the money is very important to me. Right now I'm confused. I need money so much and I love a job that makes me happy and free. I don't know what to do. The work is affecting me psychologically, mentally, physically etc. The people who are working under me are disrespecting me seriously. I feel like resigning but I don't have anything to do if I get back home.