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So, yesterday in a momment of truth, he told me that the reason he likes her is because, she does not judge him. And i do. Like when he do certain things and he tells her, she just laughs lightly. Like a recebt incident, he said “i can still remember her laugh” it got to me. It pained me. He can still remember her laugh?? Why is this girl this special. He was falling in love with her! He just did not notice it, now that the “friendship” ended because of me i feel he hates me for it. Everytime i insult her he gets on the defensive. Yesterday he told me that he doesnt know why i love him so much. And he loves me yes, but he is sure he does not love me as much as i love him or would ever be able to even though he wishes to. It pained me. It pained me that thats all i get, that no strong resolve within his heart to try. No strong resolve to want to defy the odds and be better. Maybe i have become worthless because i stayed. I am so pathetic with him. I told him i threatned her annonymously, he took out time yesterday to tell me it was a cowardly act. When it comes ti her he is defensive and protective. When it comes to me man, he dishes anything. I am trying to love him less. So that this can be a match. I dont want anybody else. I want him. And i want him to say he loves me so much he will try. I want to stop acting all weak. I want so many things.