Signup/Login

I’m 25 years old and my boyfriend is 25 years old as well but I was born in February while his birth month in November. The difference in the month wasn’t a problem at all. We’ve been dating for 2 years now. We’re so in love that people often pray for this kind of love. We’re both in the same school & department so we’re never far from each other. At the time we started dating he had nothing at all. The little I have we share and when he has too he always share with me too.
After some time, he started doing legit Yahoo and after some months he started cashing out, because he luckily got EDD (there’s this benefit money countries like USA pay there citizens during the pandemic, something like that sha, so once you get your client’s infos, you will have access to the money). He got a new apartment, furnished it, got a new phone,in fact latest iphone12 (460k+), changed his Entire wardrobe, and lot’s more. He always love to look good and expensive, even when his pocket is very empty, he’s about his looks. He then asked me how much I needed to improve my business and I told him 50k which he credited me. He never thought of changing my wardrobe or anything, well, I didn’t ask and I’m naturally not a demanding person. My phone battery was bad and he promised to get me a new phone but he didn’t, after about 2-3 months he gave me his old phone because my phone just stopped working. Everything was going well, until he had a fight we the person that gave him link to the EDD money and he didn’t have access to the money anymore, he got so broke again because he never saved, we went back to square one, depending on my small business, I support him with the little I have and once in awhile wen he gets some money,we share it too. He doesn’t have a source of income, he learnt tailoring but yet to start working, he doesn’t really like stressful works, and his dreams are high, he likes luxury, he can spend his last cash on a designer Shade, shoe or cloth, always update his looks.
He’s a very nice guy, not just to me but to other people as well. He has a lot of female friends which wasn’t a thing at first, it became a big deal when I noticed he flirts with them also.
We both have access to each other’s phone.
One day I was viewing WhatsApp status on his phone then a lady’s message came in, sincerely I’ve never gone through his messages before but something just kept on pushing me to do so, I did and I discovered that he flirts with women. This lady in particular always call him and I asked him who she was and he told me that he wanted to collect some past questions from her because she was in 400 level while we were in 300 level, same department.
He has been to her house and all, ever since I confronted him about flirting with her he will always clear his chat and call log.
Another time I saw a chat of him asking another lady(name saved as (UY)”)How was your night My love” which he already deleted but she referred Back to the message to reply with “My night was good my Bouncing Baby Boy”. I saw a lot of new ladies number and all, as usual flirting with them. Then I confronted him,. Asked him Who UY was and he told me “University of Uyo” jokingly, and why he called her his love, he said it’s nothing, it’s just pet names, meanwhile I called one of our friends sweetie via chat and he got offended but now him calling other women His Love is nothing.
He once told me that he doesn’t like a woman that keeps many male friends and I told him I don’t like men that has alot of female friends too. He also said I can make male friends but I can’t go out with them which I agreed.
We both settled our differences and went home for semester break. We live in different states not too far from each other though.
He came to visit me once but always call me and I do the same.
We resumed back to school. I started having a feeling that it’s more than flirting, then I went through his phone again and saw a video of him and another lady, they went on a couple of dates together, I saw her Tiktok handle and found out that she also posted one of those videos with the caption “it’s all love”. I saved the video showed him, he said it’s nothing, they’re just friends and just closed the case as if I wanted to start an unnecessary argument. Another video of both of them I saw on his phone, he was pecking and caressing her, I lied that I saw it on her story on Instagram because I already told him I won’t go through his phone again,so he lied and denied it that it’s not him because I couldn’t show him that video, he later said she’s just his friend and they only when out once, she paid the bills and there’s nothing between them, though the video on Tiktok, was just a normal video. Then I kept on pressing on the issue he got angry and defensive and closed the case. I stopped having sex with him and gave him some space but he couldn’t stand it, he then called me so we had a proper conversation, he lied to me about the girl, that she was disturbing him, and he stopped talking to her because she was demanding for sex,I just laughed, I was so calm, meanwhile the chat I saw, he was already dating the girl and had sex with her multiple times, though she made the first move toward him, hmm, well he’s very charming and I notice girls want to have him and all but me sef I’m a hot girl and he knows.
According to him they don’t talk anymore and I’ve never seen him call or her call or message, he said he stopped talking to her that she said she wanted to meet me, and all,that he told her he has a girlfriend but she won’t leave him alone bla bla bla.
Now she’s not the only one I have confirmed he had sex with. There are other girls he slept with in my school while we’re dating.
I saw a chat of him telling his close friend how we were having issues in our relationship and how he can’t afford to loose me or live me for any of those girls.
The problem now is that, he’s very loving, if I hadn’t gone through his phone, I won’t known all these is happening couple with the fact that I had multiple dreams about him cheating on me and I always tell him about them.
The thing now is I can’t stand a cheat. He has Never for once admitted it because I have not caught him in the act and most of my evidence was gotten through his phone and he doesn’t know because he always delete his chat and calls with other girls, so I just checked his chat with his friends and I was shocked at what I saw and It won’t make sense if I show him where I got my evidence, he”LL say I invaded his privacy. So He’ll always lie and make me feel insecure, or I’m scared of loosing him. I love him and I swear to God I’ve never cheated or thought of cheating on him. I don’t know what to do. He loves me and show it but he’s cheating on me secretly. I feel like he wants to have me and still fuck around and if I eventually marry him nothing will change that…
I don’t know what to do, or I shouldn’t have gone through his phone? I saw alot of these signs even before I started going through his phone, alot of girls do call and send money to him also. For a woman to give a man money, there must be more to it, this is one of the reasons I started going through his phone. If I have not done that I will think everything is good. He might just dumped me one day for a rich woman because I saw his chat with one of his friends about how massive one of his chick’s father’s house is, meanwhile the girl called him one time in my presence with a foreign number, he picked but the network was bad, she’s in the UK.
What can I do please? We’re still very good, but my mind’s keeps disturbing me. He is nice to my family and all.
I’m planning on going out on dates with other guys too, but not sleeping with them. But what if these other guys too will do worse?. My boyfriend loves me both indoor and outdoor but he is cheating on me secretly. Is he supposed to be sleeping around since we’re not married yet? He’s very broke but he talks to me about his plans and all, the future seem very bright. he helps me achieve some of my goals too but I don’t know why he’s not committed.
What do you think I can do?
Please help me out

3 Comments
  • Anonymous
    9:05 PM, 29 November 2022

    My dear, you sound like you know what to do but you’re afraid to be bold and confront your self.
    You love your self before loving others, including your boyfriend and why do you see yourself as a second, third, fourth or fifth fiddle ?
    Wake up……

  • Anonymous
    5:49 PM, 30 November 2022

    I understand how you feel my darling girl . Do you think he loves you ? Confront him ,set all hell loose and watch his reaction . And from his reaction you will know what to do .There is no perfect man out there , find your own shape and live with him

  • Anonymous
    6:29 PM, 6 February 2023

    On the the legit yahoo part, I already knew you can’t leave me even after seeing red flags in him. Anybody who would refer to fraud as ‘legit’ has a long way to go, you even went as far as explaining the meaning of EDD. Tell how scamming individuals of their covid benefits legit? That’s not the bone of contention in here as I don’t want to digress. You seem intelligent from the way you type but you don’t have such when it comes to your current relationship as the red flags are there but you are nonchalant.

    You need to strike a balance.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Privacy Settings
We use cookies to enhance your experience while using our website. If you are using our Services via a browser you can restrict, block or remove cookies through your web browser settings. We also use content and scripts from third parties that may use tracking technologies. You can selectively provide your consent below to allow such third party embeds. For complete information about the cookies we use, data we collect and how we process them, please check our Privacy Policy
Youtube
Consent to display content from Youtube
Vimeo
Consent to display content from Vimeo
Google Maps
Consent to display content from Google
Spotify
Consent to display content from Spotify
Sound Cloud
Consent to display content from Sound