I don’t know where to start my story from but here it goes, and I am hoping to get help on the way forward. me and my husband got married in 2021 to who I supposed was my best friend. We dated for 6 years before the wedding and we had been through so much together in school with no money or family, but we had each other. After school he was lucky and got a job on time however there was still so many debts to clear but we loved each other anyway.
I believed and saw a future for us in marriage which we talked about while in school. i Graduated from school also there same year with him but couldn’t get a real job hence I switched to freelancing. To cut the story short we got married and now have a son but the person I know is no longer here. My husband has become self-centered and keeps lots of financial secrets from me.
He even lies both disclose how much we earn and debts we had to pay but since this marriage, he has started lying about it. If he has money, he prefers to keep it and he once told it to my face that he believes I will be keeping track of the money with him that’s why he doesn’t tell me.
I have never asked this man for money for myself even while dating. I take care of all my needs myself and even when our child was to be born I bought all his things and prepared for his birth with my own money. Not a dime was contributed by the father because he didn’t have a job then and I understood. I don’t still have a real job aside the freelancing and tailoring jobs I do part time and I contribute to everything at home I even paid our last rent and try to cover up for my husband from family because I understand his job doesn’t pay so much.
But all I get from this guy is his selfishness and lies. I feel I am doing too much to support, and he doesn’t care. I really want to get a real job and focus on raising my child. I don’t know what to do about this so-called marriage because I am tired.
We have discussed this over and over again and he promises to be a better person but it’s all just a lie and I feel I had wasted all my years with the wrong person.
Anonymous
I’m sorry to hear about the difficulties in your marriage, it must be a really hard time for you. Have a honest conversations with your partner about your worries and feelings. Tell them how his behaviour is affecting you and your relationship.
It is crucial that both parties consider one another’s viewpoints and work together to reach a solution.
Also, try to seek couples therapy or see a marriage counsellor. Talking to someone with an impartial perspective can assist with managing conversations and offering suggestions on how to handle the problems in your relationship.
Taking care of yourself should come first while repairing the relationship. Go for your professional dreams and goals. Look into chances to improve your talents or get a job that fits your qualifications and interests. control over your happiness can provide a sense of fulfillment.
Consider how important it is to be open and honest about your financial condition, including your income, obligations, and outgoings. Create a budget and financial plan together that both parties can accept. At the end of the day, Trust your guts, seek assistance if needed and prioritize your wellbeing and that of your child.