I HV been married for over a year now, I and my wife had beautiful plans for the future before marriage . Just 1 month into marriage alot of things started going sour, she had expectations that were so high that disrespect started creeping in. There were emotional reactions to irrelevant things and she became very touchy. I just noticed that gradually, there was emotional disconnection between both of us. She hardly calls for sex and we could stay months without having sex. Alot of things made her angry that she reacted and started calling me names to the extent that my parents and family became her focus of banter. After several warnings she wouldn’t stop so I reacted by slapping her. I was emotional , I was in the moment but when I realised I hit my wife and she was very downcast about it, I apologised . We saw our pastor and talked about alot of misunderstandings we have been having.
This issues didn’t work out until recently we had a big altercation that she stonewalled me for 5 days and on the sixth day, she left the house in the evening.
Coming home the next day and confessed to have visited an old friend of hers who she had sex with that night .
I was devastated and cried so much . Much more cos we just got our visa to the UK just a week before this incident .
She apologised and is ready to make amends but I HV not psychologically been in the place to get over it even though I had cried to God to forgive her.
How can I be helped?
Anonymous
Hi.firstly you have to find out what made her get mad at you,did you lie to her when you were dating and as she married you she did not find all what you told her .if it’s so then you have to really come out clean.
For the cheat you were cheated upon i tell you it’s time and love that will heal you and help you forget.
Anonymous
Well, she has hurt you deeply and I can never take that part back, but as you go venturing into what the actual trigger was, do find out on your own whether you can absolutely forgive her and not to use it over her in the future and seek more counseling from experts,
But do watch out as directed is now ready to make a ends after cheating and not before when you both went to the pastor to seek counsel. Looks like she has a hang over and is comparing you with another. Be careful.