Life at a time was so fair to me, everything by was just happening the way I wanted it or perhaps maybe God’s plan but at a point it felt like everything sank. I lost my mum almost a decade ago, I thought I could handle the loss but I realized each passing day it really hit me hard. My dad was always there, filling up the role of a mother at the same time being a father figure. He did everything within his power to make all of us his kids happy but life happened again few years after mum’s death. New mum didn’t get along with me well unlike the rest of my siblings. I felt alone, dad’s love was a bit withdrawn from me so he can make his new wife comfortable and happy. I felt hated and sometimes felt like ending my life and at other times blamed death for taking away mum. Few years after I traveled abroad to further my studies, it was all rosy at the beginning but later it turned sour. I had to drop out of school cos I couldn’t afford to pay my tuition. Life was so so so horrible, I cut off contact from friends and even some family members because I was ashamed. I went into serious thinking, I was a shadow of myself, I even lost my relationship in the process. I felt my world was crumbling before my very eyes, I cried almost everyday. I was ashamed to say the truth that I couldn’t complete my studies abroad. But my dad supported in the way he could. I got another admission in my home country after a year of waiting for it, so I can leave my father’s house and avoid questions about my “abroad school” from people. It wasn’t easy but I scaled through after starting my studies again in my new school but at some point I still feel unhappy. School is over now, what next? is the big question on my mind … Life
