Hello. I have always wanted to be a reverend sister from under age ten but circumstances have shown otherwise. I’m 41 now and for the past eight years, I’ve been to over twenty-five congregations; the highest level I’ve been in any, was three months postulancy in an enviable one as seen by all and sundry.
I took my bags and left after I began feeling something pulling at me. One day, while in the chapel, I cried as if death was surely near. Later I was examined and found to be medically okay. I left as if I had a plan b. It’s almost three years after and I feel as if I’m panicking. I even tried monasteries without success. Simply decided not to go on with my stay in one which was willing to have me.
I was basically termed aimless and crazy. Why? I asked to be taken back at least three times where I had been a postulant but without success which is usually the case in such cases. But still can’t believe all these has happened. I’m a primary school teacher now and I wouldn’t like to think I want to be a religious as an escape route from the realities of life. I keep wondering how I got here; to this point. Sadly maybe I’m not called to the religious life.
Very painful words to me in past times but gradually seems like a reality I must face and of course accept. Please what does everyone think out there? Thank you
Truthshare
It’s critical to keep in mind that the path to religious life is greatly personalised and there is no universal strategy. It’s natural for you to feel hesitant and doubtful at different times throughout their spiritual journey. It’s normal to wonder if becoming a reverend sister is the appropriate path for you because it’s a big and life-changing decision.
It’s also worth considering that the religious life is not the only way to lead a meaningful and fulfilling life. You mentioned that you are currently working as a primary school teacher, which is a noble profession that allows you to make a positive impact on the lives of children. It’s possible to find purpose and fulfillment in other vocations as well.
It may be helpful to seek guidance from a spiritual advisor or counselor who can provide support and help you explore your feelings and motivations. It’s important to keep in mind that your worth and value as a person are not entirely based on your profession or choice of work.
Whether you choose to follow another path or remain in the religious community, you have the ability to have a meaningful and fulfilling life. It’s crucial to keep an open mind as your adventure continues since you never know where it will take you.